Letters

In February 2008 I receive some shocking news.
After a silence of five years my brother makes contact with me. However, this is not a reconciliation, my brother is saying goodbye to me. He is leaving. He is emigrating with his wife and children in two weeks’ time.
I’m so shocked I put the phone down on them.
I am crying, really sobbing. My husband tries to comfort me, but I’m inconsolable. An hour passes and I feel I must call my brother back. He tells me he will come to see me, to say goodbye in person. I ask him why does he want to do that considering he hasn’t been in contact for the last five years. He says he is saying goodbye to lots of people and he is doing so to draw a line under everything here, in this country.
I can hardly speak, I’m sobbing uncontrollably.
I tell him not to come, but I can’t bear it. I tell him I love him and that I thought about him every day the five years. He says he will come to say goodbye, but I repeat my plea for him not to.
I really can’t bear it.
I write him a letter. I write that I admire his strength to take his family away to a better life. I write I love him and wherever he is a I will always love him. He is my brother and he will always be my, heart.
I post the letter, I hear nothing back.
Two weeks pass and I know he has now gone.I become obsessed about his immigration. My shock is compounded into disbelief because he was always Mother’s favourite. I am convinced Mother has caused this emigration.