Searching

I am 14.Mother and grandmother are huddled together writing a letter. I can hear them discussing the contents of the letter. They are writing to the Salvation Army in an attempt to find Father. I hear them discuss that they want him found in time for my sisters 18th birthday so that she can meet him and I hear them decide to sign the letter as if it is from my sister.
Even though I have been told by Grandmother that Mother went away and when she came back she was heavily pregnant with me I have also always been told that I have the same Father as my sister.
I am beyond excited hearing them put the letter together but become confused on hearing that they are to sign the letter from my sister only and I want to know why I am not included. When I ask them they look at each other and then become cross with me, they tell me not to listen at doors to business that does not concern me, but I am too excited at the prospect of meeting my Father and tell them that they must sign the letter from me too. Again they look at each other and after a pause Mother says that the letter will be from me too and that I am to go away, mind my own business and leave them in piece to finish the letter. So I do and that is the last I hear of the letter writing, my sister never mentions it to me and neither does anyone else.
I hope that the letter has been posted and, in my mind, I constantly fantasise about my Father. I imagine him to be perfect in every way and to be relieved to have been found. I imagine him telling me that he has been searching for me too, that he has always loved me and that he lost me through no fault of his own.